Perception

It's unbelievable how many people I know who are so smart yet are stuck in a rut because they refuse to adapt to their surroundings. While its all fine and good to stick to your principles, if that is what is keeping you from progressing then perhaps your principles need to be reevaluated. I'm not sure what's better, being a smart underachiever or an average overachiever.

Life is not easy, that's obvious. But learning how to roll with the punches is what makes it interesting, to say the least. Figuring out how to adapt in order to progress is part of the fun for me. The key thing is adapting. Sure I don't have a lot of things, but I have learned to appreciate the things I do have. I don't want to sound arrogant or egotistical. What I don't understand is why people I know that are smarter than me, don't seem to be as happy. Is it because they have higher aspirations? Is it because I have low aspirations? I don't know, but I wish I could give them advice but I don't think they want advice from me. Or they wouldn't want to hear the advice I would give them. For example, I've worked with a lot of smart people who refused to change their appearance in the workplace because they wanted to be judged on their performance not their attire. Fact of the matter is, in an office setting, how you carry yourself, which includes how you present yourself aesthetically is important to how you are perceived and treated. I'm a firm believer that how you dress also affects how you carry yourself. If I see someone who obviously took the time to look somewhat professional I will more likely to treat them more professionally. Basically, I'm tired of people who focus on the idea that they are underpaid and unappreciated instead of focusing on how to progress to be overpaid and overly appreciated. Sometimes the change is easy, its just not popular. One person that I admire took a huge risk going to school out of state. They then took a job in a not so popular city because it was good experience. They knew it was temporary but they also knew it would be difficult because their friends and family were in California. Eventually, after a few years they were able to come back to California because of a great opportunity. The amazing thing is that they had the foresight to look beyond the sacrifice they had to make but to focus on the ultimate goal. Another example of this is my brother-in-law. He basically sacrificed a majority of his high school and college social life in order to help my father-in-law with his tax practice. Now he's finally retiring from the practice at 27 because he's about to take the CPA exam which I'm sure he'll ace because of all his experience. He could have easily quit when he was in high-school or college. Somehow he didn't. Now he could probably start up his own tax and payroll company. Simply amazing to me. He'll probably be one of the most successful people I personally know.

When I first started working, I drove a civic. I loved my civic, but it was time to let it go because after 200k miles, it started to become unreliable. My dad had a 98 Avalon that he said I could buy off of him. It wasn't the cool car that I hoped to be driving, now that I was making money, but I knew that it was reliable and definitely affordable. While I loved my civic, buying a new car when you are 20 and trying to keep up with payments, insurance, and rent while going to school and working part-time was one of the most difficult things to do. So taking over the Avalon was an easy choice for me. 10 years later, I still drive that Avalon. I will probably drive it a couple more years then finally buy a nice car for myself. My point is that because I didn't splurge on a new car, I was able to save money for a decent ring for my wife, a beautiful wedding, and a condo. Maybe my priorities are different from everyone else, but I think I made the right decision. Knowing that I didn't have a car payment gave me peace of mind that was unimaginable. It was the polar opposite of the stress of keeping my civic.

If I had to do it over again, I wouldn't have bought a new car when I wasn't fully independent. At my first job, I would have dressed up all the time even though there wasn't a dress code. Anytime someone criticizes me, its probably for something I did or they observed. Instead of trying to correct them, I try to figure out what caused them to criticize me and how to change it. The lessons I've learned I still apply today and will apply in the future. If there is something I'm unhappy about, before I start complaining about it, I'm gonna figure out what I need to do to make a change. I think for every sacrifice I've made, I'm finally reaping the benefits. I guess its like paying your dues. I hope that I will be able to teach my kids these lessons instead of them having to learn themselves. I don't think its "selling out", I think its more about focusing on the big picture and the long term goals.